Tag: humor
group name: amusingmusings
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December 01, 2009 02:13 PM EST --
"I loved President Bush. (. . .) He is my No. 1 man in my life." President Obama's aunt, Zeituni Onyango, Associated Press
Zeituni Onyango, President Obama's aunt . . .
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December 01, 2009 08:05 AM EST --
It's that time of year again. The combustible mixture of free booze, poinsettia corsages and the slick, soulful sounds of Eddie Venturi and the Fastidians will cause people to get up and dance at . . .
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January 02, 2009 12:17 PM EST --
How to be a Mental Patient
A Guide for the Amateur Only
Introduction:
Etiquette, we know, is important, and help is available at any book store or newsstand.
But will be useful? . . .
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November 29, 2009 08:42 PM EST --
My kids updated the old "wallet on a string" gag, using a remote control car. They taped a festive bow on a box lid that fit down over their toy RC car, then set it out on the sidewalk with the car hidden . . .
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November 30, 2009 07:58 AM EST --
Christmas is for Ditzes! by Mariah Carey ( Audio CD ) Buy new : $24.98 $10.99 67 Used & new from $7.97 Usually ships in 9 to 14 days Eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping. . . .
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July 05, 2006 12:51 PM EDT --
To write or not to write. That is the dilemma which has troubled me recently.
When I came to gather, I never imagined that I would end up writing for the "Jerry Springer Show" contestants. Yet . . .
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February 17, 2006 12:15 PM EST --
Nothing inspires me to write like a sink full of dirty dishes.
Seriously.
I can be pondering the articles I have in my head and just give up for a while, then go to attack the dishes and it's like . . .
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April 30, 2006 01:43 PM EDT --
1. I was born dead. When my heart stopped beating during delivery, they knocked my mom out, removed me with forceps and spent 2 minutes reviving me. The jury is still out as to if there . . .
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April 02, 2006 01:36 PM EDT --
On a lazy Sunday afternoon, I call to my two cats, Mao and Cheddar. And they come running.
I called "Baby Fooooood." Sure, they know the words, "Baby Food." They're cats. . . .
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May 11, 2006 07:22 PM EDT --
Some of my most vivid memories involve some level of embarrassment.
My greatest humiliation came in the Spring of 1984 in Reno, Nevada. Surprisingly, the event went unnoticed by anyone but me and my girlfriend . . .
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March 29, 2006 03:57 PM EST --
At worship on Sunday, a man stood up and asked for forgiveness for his sins. I said we should murder him for his transgressions, but I was shouted down. Later, it was noted that someone was no longer . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:30 PM EDT --
I have a question. This particular question has plagued me for the past month, tried my wits and patience, and left me feeling uncertain about my mental faculties. I'm stumped. So I pose this question . . .
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July 14, 2006 12:31 PM EDT --
Here's some blonde jokes that were sent to me. Hope you enjoy especially if you're blonde.
Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?
They went to see . . .
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February 06, 2006 12:18 PM EST --
Some families are renown for their dedication to the preservation of artisan skills – wine making, the crafting of fine musical instruments, or perhaps simply a sour dough starter that has been . . .
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April 05, 2006 11:20 AM EDT --
Clutching my seventy-five cent deli corn dog, my body hanging precariously in mid air, I realized that time had stopped – which was convenient because it gave me both the opportunity to reflect on . . .
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July 19, 2006 05:09 PM EDT --
EAST BRIDGEWATER, Mass. Amy LeBlanc couldn't wait for her eighteenth birthday, but it wasn't presents she was looking forward to.
"I wanted to go out and get a tattoo that would really . . .
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April 19, 2006 02:56 PM EDT --
Oh dear, what shall I do
My Gather Points went down to two
Hundred, it's not enough
I say things are tough
Perhaps Tom Gerace I should woo!
Now Dean is really upset
And Hannah's taking . . .
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March 16, 2006 09:10 PM EST --
While wondering through the aisles of the grocery store I noticed a display case in the pharmacy area. In the case were yellow bottles with a grinning monkey, giving a thumbs up. His butt is very large . . .
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May 12, 2006 10:40 AM EDT --
Slowly he trod over the barren sand, in search of his prey. His finely tuned instincts born from centuries of breeding at full-force. He was a German Shorthair Pointer by God. The world's greatest . . .
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January 20, 2009 07:36 PM EST --
Nude Mice Indecent, Says the Society for Indecency to Animals
SINA, the Society for Indecency to Animals is once more in the news.
SINA, (pronounced 'sinna') swam into public view in . . .
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